I really need a winning streak.  When Crick and I first hatched the idea of this buy-a-season-ticket-and-chronicle-our-experiences-as-season-ticket-holders idea, we never expected the Knicks to be good.  We knew this season would serve as a trial run for us as both fans and writers.  It would be warm up for us before the Knicks became an actual basketball team.  But, even at our most pessimistic moments, we never expected it to be this brutal.

Just because the tunnel is darker than expected doesn’t mean that the light at the end is any less bright than it was a month ago.  7/1/10 still looms, and as difficult it may seem now it’s important as Knicks fans to remember that this season was a Ray Guy punt from the start and that the real excitement will begin this summer. 

With all of that in mind, I’m prepping for tip off again here at MSG.  Expect the usual - nicknames for opposing players that are only funny to me, references to how many beers I drink because drinking is cool, and the most Chris Duhon hate you’ll find on the World Wide Web. 

1ST QUARTER

0-2 - The Knicks didn’t make me wait long for my first booing of Vince Carter as VC hits a jumper to open the scoring.  I’m not going to say anything mean about Vince that hasn’t already been said (just google “vince carter” and “vagina”), but I can’t help but be reminded of the guy whenever I see Pete Campbell on Mad Men.  Campbell’s a sniveling, scheming, overrated, brat who nobody likes.  I can’t figure out why he reminds me of Vince so much.

5-7 - Wilson Chandler gets a quick 4 points.  The 2,500 Chandler fans in attendance who can’t believe they dropped $80 on a Chandler Swingman jersey a year ago just deeply sighed and sipped their beers.

15-17 - Chandler and Lee are playing well but the Magic are spreading their offense around.  Jason Williams just got on the board.  Our seats are pretty good, but not good enough to be able to see the greatest tattoo in NBA history…

19-17 - Duhon is 2/2 and the Knicks have the lead.  No joke here, this is real.

29-26 Gallo! There’s a nervous buzz in the building when Gallo gets a look at a three.  We’re like a beaten dog, slowly approaching our new owner as he offers up a treat.  And Gallo is the Dog Whisperer.

2ND QUARTER

35-35 - I usually have all kinds of complaints about nearby fans at this point, but these Sunday games bring out a family crowd.  A lot of families mean a lot of short kids who don’t block your view, random hot moms, and short lines at the beer stand.  Sunday games mean short people, milfs, and quick access to beer - no wonder churches are filled with little kids and old women.

37-37 - JJ Redick drives drunk to the basket, hits a jumper, shows off his backne, reads a poem, then pisses on a woman in the first row.  Phew, got that out of my system.

42-37 - Gallo hits another 3 to put the Knicks up 5.  After 4 games in 5 days, the Magic look as lazy as Stu Scott’s left eye.

52-52 - Duhon and Matt Barnes hit back to back 3s in a highly competitive game.  That’s the most unlikely back to back feat since the same guy played Michael Oher and Precious in consecutive movies.

3RD QUARTER

61-66 - Lewis and Pietrus each hit a 3 to put the Magic up 5.  I should be upset, but I’m still giggling from the Blind Side joke.

64-73 - I can’t overstate how important the combination of cold Bud Lights and my cell phone memo pad is to my Knicks experience.  Without catching a buzz while typing out one liners to use in my post, I’d be as lost as Eddy Curry trying to turn on a treadmill.

73-82 - My energy in this game has transformed faster than Christian Bale after filming The Machinist.  It probably has as much to do with the 3 day old turkey and 80 ounces of Bud Light in my stomach as it does with the Knicks performance this quarter, but I blame it entirely on Chris Duhon and his stupid face.

4TH QUARTER

77-89 - I expect D’Antoni to dick around Hill…but where the hell is T-Doog???

86-94 - Nasty Nate is going kind of bonkers right now.  He’s just pulling up and hitting high arching jumpers.  The guy is so cool you almost forget he can’t cover anyone other than Earl Boykins and is ice cold 3 out of every 4 games.

95-106 - Just checked my phone, Nate has NINETEEN points in the 4th quarter.  And the Knicks somehow lost ground.  That’s all you need to about Ol’ Nasty.

102-114 - Al Harrington tosses and turns all night, dreaming of repeatedly dunking while down 10 with less than a minute left in the 4th quarter.  He’s actually running back on defense with a boner.

FINAL - MAGIC WIN - 114-102

Even the Knicks can’t cover in obvious trap games.  Considering Jameer Nelson’s injury and the fact that this was the end of a long, successful road trip, “LET DOWN GAME” might as well have been flashing on the MSG marquee.  But the Magic hung around and pulled away with ease in the 2nd half.  The Knicks only played 8 guys in what appears to be a a giant middle finger from D’Antoni to Knicks fans.  Benching your two rookies during a rebuilding year?  That’s as stupid as passing on a franchise PG in the draft for a PF who doesn’t even fit into your system.  Oh, wait…